The Song

It's the Parkinson's that gets me. Sometimes I just get so damned dizzy! Maybe I should write a song:

I'm so dizzy, my head is spinning.
Like a whirlpool, it never ends.
I'm so dizzy...

But I suppose its been done.

The other day I was walking down a hallway. I was feeling faint but thought I was hiding it pretty well. A women came up to me, and asked, "Honey are you ok? Because you look like you're about to fall down!"

I told her I was fine. She replied: "I have six grand kids, and when I see one looking like you, I know they ain't fine!"

So much for keeping my secrets to myself.

My doctor has thoroughly checked me out and pronounced me "fit as a fiddle." Stress test, blood work, BP, the whole nine yards: I'm in great shape. My body is in better shape than guys 20 years younger than me. "Yes, I'm bragging."

So, I suppose it's the Parkinson's. Which makes me so mad!

No one wants Parkinson's. No one likes it. But I feel like having it is a cosmic joke. I've been interested in it for years, because it's a weird disease. You don't go to the doctor, have a blood sample taken and get it analyzed.

Instead, you give the doctor a writing sample. He watches you walk, watches your face. Checks your balance, has you follow an object with your eyes. So the diagnosis is based on exhibited symptoms, not diagnostic blood work. That, to me, is what makes it interesting. I mean, some guy looks at your writing and says "You have an incurable disease that will slowly kill you. Oh, yes, have a nice day." It's like he's a witch doctor or clairvoyant.