Mr. Monkey

Ok, I'm depressed. I've denied it to myself for a month, but I can't get this monkey off my back. It's really hard for me to motivate myself to ride. And when I ride it's not with the intensity that I had last year. Last year I would average 17.5 mph on my workouts. That includes riding up out of Chagrin River valley; usually an 7-8 percent grade for almost a mile.

This year I haven't even bothered to measure my average. I'm sure it's under 15 mph.

The bit of good news is riding does improve my mood. I'm sure it's the endorphins. Hell, when I start riding to St. Louis, from Denver, I should be the happiest guy alive! Ha. Ha.

Last night I averaged about 9 mph coming up out of the valley. I took Berkshire Road, one of the easiest climbs out, but still that ain't (sic) bad. Latter on the ride I met another rider who told me he tried to keep up with me coming up Berkshire, but couldn't. That made me feel good too.

Still, I have big doubts. So do my friends.

Joe:
"So why you doing two legs of the ride this year? Why not ride to Boston next year?"

"Because Parkinsons is relentless, and I don't know if I will be able to do the last leg next year."

"Do you remember how you felt when you got back last year?"

"Yep. I was sick of riding. Went out for one ride around my circuit, and that was it. I was done. Kaput. Finished."

"So what makes you think this year is going to be different?"

"Nothing. I'm just going to have to tough it out."

"And what happens if you're in the middle of nowhere, and you hit The Wall?" (An expression for hitting your physical limits.)

"I'll just have to deal with that."

We'll see how well I deal with that. Stay tuned.